Before i write any truth about anyone else, i have to write some truth about myself......simply said, i am absolutely heartbroken.....i cant even put into words what this situation has done to me.....just broke my heart...i dont use those words lightly...and all im really wishing for is to have my friend, the woman i care so deeply for, back in my life, in some form....i miss her so dearly....i just do....she came into my life at a crucial time....everything got fucked up, for many reasons, but i love her, and i miss her......

its a pretty ironic day for me. you see, 8 years ago today, this whole awful painful part of my life started. my wife of 4 years, who i really only married because she insisted, walked onto the deck i built at the house we bought in scranton, pa....she said, " i have bad news, im leaving...." my response was, "youre leaving? you just got here"....well, she was leaving....for another man. a younger man who played her for every last thing she had.....but thats another story...the point is that since that day, i have never been the same.......